funny stories, humor and jokes - aguywalkedintoabar.com » geographic

Crawling Home Again

dave — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 00:32:54 +0000

An Irishman had been drinking at a pub all night with his friends. The bartender finally said that the bar was closing. So then he stood up to leave and fell flat on his face. He tried to stand one more time but with the same result. He figured he’ll … Read the rest

Suprise!

dave — Tue, 05 Jun 2007 15:16:58 +0000

An Italian, an Irishman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, â€œYourâ€™re in charge of sweeping,â€? to the Irishman, â€œYouâ€™re in charge of shoveling, and to the Chinese guy, â€œAnd youâ€™re in … Read the rest

Native Tongue

dave — Sun, 13 May 2007 16:33:42 +0000

anyone who’s traveled extensively abroad can appreciate this one…

A man decided to visit his brother who was stationed in Germany. He assumed that most Germans would speak English. But he quickly discovered that many people spoke only their native tongue, including the ticket inspector on the train.

The inspector … Read the rest

London Underground

dave — Fri, 27 Apr 2007 17:42:26 +0000

Considering I travel to london on a near weekly basis, I can (unfortunately) relate to this. I had the mp3 of the song for quite a while, but never knew who originally produced it, and now I know.

The London Underground song is by the comedy band Amateur Transplants (Dr. … Read the rest

Too much in common

dave — Sat, 17 Mar 2007 15:00:47 +0000

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink.

“Why of course,” comes the reply.

The first man then asks: “Where are you from?”

“I’m from Ireland,” replies the second man.

The first man responds: “You don’t say, … Read the rest

A Scottish Romance

dave — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 14:12:26 +0000

A young Scottish lad & lass were sitting on a low stone wall holding hands & gazing out over the loch. For several minutes they sat silently, then finally the girl looked at the boy & said, “A penny for your thoughts, Angus.”

“Well, uh, I was thinkin’…perhaps it’s aboot … Read the rest

Sign language gone awry

dave — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 19:10:32 +0000

An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are all to give speeches to the Deaf Society.

Two men in a hot air balloon …

crussell — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 16:53:37 +0000

… get blown wildly off course and become lost after drifting into dense fog. After several hours of failing to discover where they are, one of the gentlemen says “I can tell where we are simply by reaching down into the fog!”

He promptly reaches over the edge of the … Read the rest