One day jobless mime is visiting the zoo and attempts to earn some money as a street performer. As soon as a crowd starts forming around him, a zoo keeper suddenly grabs him and drags him into his office. The zoo keeper explains to the mime that he has a desperate situation, the zoo’s most popular attraction, a gorilla, has just died suddenly. He now fears that attendance at the zoo will fall off without their star attraction.

He offers the mime a job to dress up as the gorilla until they can get another one. The mime, without any other means of making a living, accepts.

So the next morning the mime puts on the gorilla suit and enters the cage before the zoo opens. He discovers that it’s actually a great job. He can sleep all he wants, play and make fun of people and he draws bigger crowds than he ever did as a mime. After a couple months, the crowds tire of him and he tires of just swinging on tires.

He begins to notice that the people are paying more attention to the lion in the cage next to his. Not wanting to lose the attention of his audience, he climbs to the top of his cage, crawls across a dividing wall, and dangles from the top to the lion’s cage. Of course, this makes the lion furious, but the crowd loves it.

At the end of the day the zoo keeper comes and gives the mime a raise for being such a good attraction. Well, this goes on for some time, the mime keeps taunting the lion, the crowds grow larger, and his salary keeps going up. Then one unfortunate day when he is dangling over the furious lion he slips and falls. The mime is frozen with fear.

The lion gathers itself and prepares to pounce. The mime is so scared that he begins to run round and round the cage in a panic with the lion close behind. Finally, the mime starts screaming and yelling, “Help me, help me!”, but the lion is quick and pounces.

The mime soon finds himself flat on his back looking up at the angry lion and the lion says, “Shut up you idiot! Do you want to get us both fired?!”

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~ author unknown

One day a frightened homeowner called the zoo and said, ” There’s a huge gorilla in my tree in the front yard!” The zoo keeper arrived in no time flat since he had prepared everything immediately after the escape.

He said to the homeowner, ” Stay calm. I know what to do, but I need your help.” With that he went to his van and retrieved his gorilla capturing tools: one pair of handcuffs, 9mm handgun, and a big German Shepherd named Rosco. Read more »